Famous Last Words
by Ilandere Okami
Summary: L escaped Kira's clutches - but only secretively. Now, he's drawn back to Japan at the height of Kira's reign. There, he finds Mello praying in a church on his last night. And he finally realized his hidden feelings. LxMello one-shot prize for contest


**Author's Note: Prize for Odelia is the Oddie for getting second place in my Colliding Death Note Contest. They wished for an L/Mello fic. I'm not against this couple. This is story actually sounded interesting to write… ^-^' the original idea actually had a slightly different vibe to Mello's first words, but I decided on this instead. It seems more like the hidden Mello I've put into this storyline. The reason it's named "Famous Last Words" is b/c I was actually listening to the song when I decided to just sit down and write this. I was about to search through my songs to find a good title and thought, "Hmm, that might work," and then looked up the lyrics. I hope this fits as well as I think it does!**

**I actually decided to tell some of the story in flashback mode instead of L explaining it all; an experimentation, like always. I also debated for quite a while if I should add a lemon. There were too many reasons against it, sorry, so no. ((Several reasons are: 1) they're in a church, 2) I couldn't decide which one would be seme or uke, and L ultimately won the seme but I couldn't get Mello beneath him in my mind, 3) the mood wasn't right…*sigh*))**

**How to Read: L's POV; **_Italics are flashbacks_**; **_**bold and italics are present time**_

**I've never written something quite like this; wish me luck!**

**Warnings: Pedo!L ((well, it **_**is**_** taking place in the DN universe; they're ten years apart)); yaoi goodness; L/Mello**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. I don't own the song "Famous Last Words" by My Chemical Romance either. I also don't own this idea. ^_-**

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Famous Last Words

Rain was pouring down. That's one of the things I can remember the most about that night. The rain, accompanied by a feeling of foreboding, too similar to the day I was destined to die.

~*~

"_I can hear church bells, Light-kun. Don't you hear them too?"_

_He truly thought I thought I was going to die that day. He watched me die in his arms. I saw a smirk set on his face. Kira._

~*~

"_Rem, may I speak with you?" I called to the shinigami one night while Watari was asleep. I was alone with her, for neither of us ever slept. She came to me, curious as to what I had to ask. I had been asking about the rules of the Death Note ever since we had found her._

"_What is it, L?" she asked in her deep voice. I normally hadn't talked to her as politely as I was now. However, I truly didn't wish to get on her bad side at this time._

_I took a deep breath before telling her everything I could. "I know you are on Kira's side. I also know that if I get too far in the case, you will kill me. The last bit of information I know is that Light is Kira and Misa must be the second Kira. Now, before you act, please know that I have no way of proving this. However, if I was to pass on my position as L to Light, I have a feeling my successors will be able to trap him eventually. There is a time tomorrow I know you will find appropriate for killing Watari and me. We're putting in doubles of ourselves at that time. I will convince Light that I know I'm going to die tomorrow." She was silent throughout, slightly surprised, I think._

_Finally, Rem spoke. "There are consequences for a shinigami interfering with something like this. Are you saying you will not continue the investigation?"_

"_Not I, myself. My successors will soon, nevertheless. They don't have and will never have all the information against Light; it's up to them if they even suspect him. There still is the chance that Kira will win in the end, but it is completely up to you who you believe."_

_After a bit more convincing, she agreed._

~*~

I needed refuge from the rain. It was just too sudden when it caught me. I was out on a walk that night, for no reason in particular.

~*~

_I called Watari into the room. We were currently in a hotel suite in Italy. We often traveled, not wanting to stay in the same place for too long, while also finally enjoying all the places I had visited during my work as L._

"_Yes, L?" he asked once he stood by my side._

_I didn't look at him as I talked, too absorbed in what I was reading on my computer. "You've always told me to trust my instincts, and follow any feeling I have, correct?"_

"_Yes, I have. Do you have a feeling now?"_

_I sighed. "I know you've told me to stay away from the Kira case at all costs, so I don't even know what is going on now in terms of that, but I have the strongest feeling that I __must__ go to Japan as soon as possible. Could you please arrange that?" On my question, I turned to him, pleading with my eyes. Rarely did I use the word "please" so he must have understood how important it was to me._

~*~

There was a small church nearby. I wasn't in the best part of town, not wishing to see anyone recognizable, but still close-by to those I needed to be. I hurried to the petite building, not wishing to be completely soaked through.

No light was shown in the windows before I entered, so I was surprised to see a small flickering flame.

~*~

_I left the inn we were staying in, following the same feeling I had that brought us here._

"_L?" Watari called after me._

_Without turning around, I answered his unvoiced question. "I'm going for a walk. Do not worry; I will be back soon enough."_

_Just like the father he considered himself to be to me, he replied, "But it will rain soon!"_

_I was already gone. I needed to find what this feeling meant._

~*~

In front of the candle was a form, the shape of a person praying. The small fire shown across the figure's body enough to reflect off the leather-like clothing the person was wearing as well as the golden hair fanning down, hiding the face from view.

"Please," the person was saying, almost too low to hear. It was a man's voice, perhaps in his late teens, early twenties. "Please don't let us die tomorrow. You are my only G-d. This is why I must stop Kira and his reign; he is not like You in any way. Don't let us die; don't let Matt die, please." He crossed himself and stood.

I had been standing by the door, which I had closed silently, but was slowly creeping towards the man. The draw that had brought me back to Japan was stronger than ever.

When the man turned around, I saw his face for the first time. It was familiar to some extent, but had changed dramatically from the last time I'd seen him.

~*~

_Roger had brought my three top successors to see me. Near was too disinterested, Matt too indifferent. But the second in line, the one in the middle, was different from anyone I had seen before._

_His icy eyes held anger and emotion that I knew I lacked. His fair hair was kempt and shining slightly in the light from the ceiling. He had black clothes on that contrasted too well with his skin, like everyone's in that room, a pasty pale. But instead of making him look like a ghost, he just glowed more._

_He snapped off a bit of chocolate from the bar in his hand, causing the red rosary that had so far gone unnoticed to sway slightly across his chest._

~*~

A scar marred the left side of his face and his left shoulder. His hair was less well kept and jagged, as if he didn't care about it anymore or wanted it to look "cool." Leather hugged his legs and his chest—more-or-less. Worry was plain in his usually hard eyes, small streams of tears actually making their way down his cheeks.

He stopped, wide-eyed, as he took in me from the other side of the room, outlined by the moonlight.

~*~

"_You're seriously L?" the blond asked, slightly skeptical, but admiration slipping slightly into his words. At my nod, his scowl turned into a bright smile and he rushed forward, away from the other two, grabbing me from around the waist and into a tight hug. "You're my idol!" he cried into my stomach._

_I looked down at him, thinking, 'And you're my successor.'_

~*~

"Who's there?" he called out, arm reaching towards the front of his pants. "Show yourself!" In such a strange and slightly scary situation, he was quite confident, even if I could see all his emotions playing out in his eyes.

Finally, I answered him. "Just light a few more candles. I can barely see you, Mello."

~*~

_He beamed up at me after a few more minutes of just hugging me. "I'm Mello," he said, stepping away from me and pointing a thumb to his chest with pure confidence I myself admired. "I'm second in all of Wammy's, right behind the white-haired twit over there."_

_I looked behind him at Near. "No need to insult the competition. We play clean and fair here." When I looked back into his eyes, anger was back, but still clouded over with respect. He nodded his head solemnly, but I knew he would never stop being rude to the other._

"_Oh, and this is Matt, my best friend. When I become the next L, he's gonna be my Watari! I'm never gonna leave him!"_

~*~

He stepped back, out of the candle's light. "Who are you?!" he cried. Nobody in Japan must know his name. "Kira?!"

I cocked my head to the side and reached my hand up to the wall, searching for a light switch. Upon finding one, and flicking it upward, no lights turned on. The power must've been out from the storm I could barely hear brewing outside.

"Highly unlikely; if I was, you'd already be dead, wouldn't you?" I replied, stepping closer. He continued backward before there was a sound of him hitting the wall in the darkness. I kept coming closer until I reached the candles, where I lit a few more in the dim light. When I looked up, his eyes were still as wide as before, but wonder was fighting for dominance inside them.

"L?" he breathed out.

~*~

"_He really admires you, L. Mello always tries so hard to be number one so you will wish to see him again."_

~*~

At my nod, his lips turned upward slightly and he took a step forward hesitantly. This was the feeling I had, seeing him again, for the last time, I knew.

"L!" he shouted, the letter echoing around the empty chapel, at last running to me, wrapping his arms around me, head buried in my neck. My arms easily fit around his slim waist. I could feel what seemed to be a gun in the front of his pants. Oh, that must be why he was reaching there earlier.

The skin on my neck and shoulder felt slightly wet before I realized he was crying again. "I thought you died, L…I was avenging you…that's why I'm finding Kira, to kill him for you…to beat Near once and for all…L…"

I patted his back, the leather feeling odd against my hand. I pulled him away from me and looked into his glistening eyes. Slowly I leaned forward, whispering, "I didn't die…Mello…"

~*~

"_I do wish to see him again," I replied. In my mind I added, 'but not as detective and successor.'_

~*~

Our lips met, softly and cautiously. Sparks flew through me. This was the reason we had come back to Japan. I needed to see Mello. My heart knew this would be my last time. But at that moment, all I registered was his mouth against my own, slowly caressing my lips, fitting together perfectly.

I had only seen him once, but my memory of his arms hadn't changed. They were still slender yet strong, even though it had been years ago. Those arms around my neck pulled me closer.

"Don't leave me tonight, L," he whispered, breaking this kiss.

I kissed his cheek, taking with me some of his tears. "I don't want to leave you, never did."

~*~

_Watari called me to him. He had been working on his computer, checking for updates Roger sent him from Wammy's House._

"_Mello ran away after finding out about your death," he said softly._

_I knew I hurt him. Why did I have the feeling I would never see him again?_

~*~

I pushed my lips to his again, not as tentative as before. He understood my meaning and pressed into me. His hands grabbed fistfuls of my hair as I unzipped his leather vest, feeling the skin on his chest. He backed up slightly from the pressure I had on him, plus my evidently cold hands.

The table with the candles was knocked slightly, and the candles I had lit blew out, only the single candle Mello had lit earlier remained aflame.

~*~

"_L, sir, please stop staring at that drawing of Mello." I jolted at the sound of my guardian's voice. As I took in his words, I immediately covered the drawing. Even done in pencil, it held Mello's obvious emotion, his instincts, and the like. "This is the third time I've caught you staring at it. Are you being biased towards your successors for unknown reasons or is there something more to this?"_

_I looked away, embarrassed. There was indeed more, though I could not figure out what yet. Seeing as it would be quite odd if I were to stare at the real Mello for hours on end, I contented myself with the drawing. I needed to figure out what was wrong with me._

~*~

In the low light, we could barely see each other. We slid to the floor, Mello atop me. One of his hands was reaching underneath my shirt, feeling me much the same way I was touching him.

His hands soon went lower, to my stomach, as his lips left mine to venture to my neck. I knew where he was heading, and didn't wish for it. I may have feelings for him, but I truly didn't want to have sex with him, who was so much younger than I was, who I didn't wish to taint more than I already had with his illusions as to why he was doing whatever he was praying for earlier.

"N-no," I pleaded, somehow able to get the words out. "Please, I don't wish to…have sex…now…" He sighed but rolled off me.

We laid like that for a little while in silence before I asked, "What were you praying for, Mello?"

He pulled me closer, but answered quietly, "I wanted protection for tomorrow…I don't want Matt to die…"

~*~

_I looked over reports of the students of Wammy's House. Mello's name standing apart from the rest, no different from normal for me._

_I sighed to myself, an identifiable emotion washing over me as I read yet another entry stating how Mello and Matt were inseparable. Roger stated in the report that he wouldn't be surprised if they never left each other's sides for the rest of their lives._

~*~

The emotion I hadn't felt for so long, since I died, since Mello left Wammy's, spread through my being. "And why would Matt die tomorrow? What would you need protection from?" Why was it so hard to get the other man's name out?

Mello scooted even closer to me, legs wrapped around my own. I could only see his silhouette in the single candle's light, so I couldn't read his eyes for his emotions, but he said directly to my own eyes, "We're kidnapping Takada tomorrow, to help Near beat Kira."

I gasped. I had watched enough news to know who Takada was. The amount of Kira supporters out there, the amount of bodyguards…The percent of them being killed was higher than ninety. But why would he risk his life to help the one he hates the most? Was it truly to avenge my "death?" And why put his life in another's hands, one that I didn't even believe in?

~*~

_I turned to Light, who was currently trying to sleep on the other side of the bed. I hadn't thought about my successors in a while, but something I was researching, about how many thought Kira as a god, sparked my memory. Wasn't Mello Catholic? He always wore that rosary…_

"_Light-kun, do you believe in God?" I asked, waking him from his sleep. He was almost asleep at that time, I thought._

_He murmured in response, very groggily, "I'm not Kira."_

"_No, do you believe in a __real__ higher being? I always thought our fate was in our own hands, that there is nobody watching out for us, but maybe it all has to do with the fact that I always thought I was alone, doing everything for myself…"_

"_Ryuzaki…I don't believe in any God. If there was one, then my life would be very different from it is now…"_

"_Someone I know believes in the Almighty God. I think he puts too much faith in Him." Light didn't answer me; he had fallen asleep again, not to remember the conversation in the morning._

~*~

"Mello, please, don't do this," I pleaded. Never had I shown so much emotion, but this man brought it out in me.

I felt him shake his head against my shoulder, where he had laid it after his words. "I have to, L. It's the only way to trap Kira…"

A tear escaped my eyes, going unnoticed in the near-darkness. "I don't want you to die…" I whispered, voice hoarse and slightly choked up.

"Don't cry!" Mello could hear it in my voice. "That's why I was here in the first place. That's what that candle is for. G-d's going to make sure Matt and I survive!"

I remained silent after that, maybe from the mention of the being I didn't believe in, maybe from the mention of the man I finally realized I was jealous of, maybe from the confidence in Mello's voice that told me it would be like arguing with a brick wall; he was unafraid.

Eventually, I fell asleep. His breathing was already even, so I knew he was asleep as well. When I woke up the next morning…I was alone, but three fading words could still be sensed throughout the small building, as if they wouldn't leave until I heard them. "I love you." The candle was still flickering.

~*~

"_**I waited in the church, watching the flame of the candle, entranced by its dance. The rain had subsided, my feeling of need gone, but the foreboding was still there. I waited in the church for hours, until nightfall hit. By then, Watari had gone out to search for me. As he opened the door, a gust of wind blew the candle out, the flickering light gone. I had actually cried out in anguish at that. I knew it was fate. I knew you had died."**_

_**A raindrop lands on my cheek. I look up to see it starting to rain. "L, let's go. I think you've prayed long enough."**_

_**I stand finally from my perch at the edge of the grave. Still, the words I could not utter aloud remain caught in my throat. I could never say that I loved him, Mello…but I did…**_

_**Walking away, Watari's arm wrapped around my shoulders comfortingly, I whisper almost too soft for even myself to hear, "There is no God."**_

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**Author's Note: Gah! The ending! As soon as I realized what I was doing with the flashbacks, I decided this would be L reflecting back on that one night, remembering things in the past instead of explaining anything, while next to Mello's grave. And the ending? Well, the last line I think I was originally gonna have L say that he loved Mello back, but then I was rereading the lyrics of the song, and realized that L hadn't said it out loud yet, and well…it seemed more appropriate for him to finally realize his feelings, but not be able to say them. And from thinking about one of the last things I was writing for this, it seemed more appropriate for L to actually know that there must be no G-d if Mello had put so much faith in Him, yet died.**

**Very depressing, but it is what was asked for…more or less. I will say that I'm sorry if it isn't truly what Odelia is the Oddie wished for, but when the inspiration finally hit, the storm pulled me through to this. I hope you like it all the same. After all, you did say, and I quote, "****But I would like it to end with Mello leaving L sleeping and going to meet up with Matt to finalize their plans." Technically, part of it did end that way, but it just left me with too much of a cliffhanger on L's side. And it **_**was**_** L's point of view…*sigh***

**And a message to reviewers: I will not accept any kind of flame on this story in any way possible. I understand that the flashbacks must be quite confusing. After all, one scene continues through three flashbacks, yet the rest are all over the place. Do not comment on this please. I hope they are understandable enough even with the oddness. .;**

**PS: A virtual cookie to those who find the bit of irony in one of flashback!Mello's lines. *Giggles* I couldn't resist the irony!**


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